Live, Love and Laugh

So, is there anything else for me to write about, besides work grouses that revolves around the same theme of being over-worked? I guess not actually.

My emotions had been whirled up after a strange conversation with someone today. I call it strange, because the topic just popped up from nowhere, and it felt as if it had hit the core of the problem I have been trying to bury at the back of my mind. Or perhaps, there's more reasons for the huge wash of emotions. And it's really strange as certain fond, but reserved memories came flooding in.

And then the conversation moved on to something a lil' uncomfortable. Or perhaps I'm just overly-sensitive. Anyhow, I knew that the conversation has to stop. One, for practical reasons (I would like to be working during working hours). Two, I'm not sure, and am afraid of where the conversation is heading.

People do change over time. It felt especially so with that someone. Oh well, I'm probably reading into things abit too much.

I remembered the lingering pain in the eyes of ex-lovers, as I secretly observed the hug that Jo and Ad gave each other on her last day of work here, about 2 months ago by now. Love does brings us both happiness and sadness. All of a sudden, the flame of love flickers, and you realise that both essence of emotions waivers with it. Parting with each other then seem to be no chore at all, as everything gets lost in the wind. If only all breakups are that amicable of course! For we all know, love usually ends in pain for the unwilling party.

I'm not sure what I'm really driving at actually. I just need to get the anxious little butterflies out of my stomach. That's all.

On the other hand, I'm feeling kinda afraid of my own changing behaviour and preferences. I'm basically quite afraid of meeting new people and hate going to social events nowadays. Even if I do, I'd be cringing with shyness at a corner, and praying secretly that the misery would be over soon. I'm not really sure what's going on in my life. All that is comforting is to hide in my hole and be a loser. I'm hating somone at the back of my mind for making me feel inferior about myself. By now, those words and actions have taken away quite a chunk of me. I hate those poison, and I hate myself even more by allowing someone to do this to me.

I don't want to sound like a half-crazed fool by getting all emotional. Getting my priorities right is the most important thing at the moment. What I need now is get myself ready for the next level of challenge, and reap new success in my life. I'm not refering to career per se. This must not be the only thing we strive for in life. I need to rebuild myself and the happiness I wished for. Something can be done to get things right again.

And finally, may I extend the well-wishes that I have sent via SMS to a few friends in Singapore to anyone who may see this:

"Dear friends, hope you're looking forward to new goals and continue to nuture meaningful relationships in the coming new year."

Sent on NYE

For I know, there are always many spots in this world where many others are going through a greater deal of challenges in life. Hope this brief (and not so personal) greeting would brighten your day.

P/s: I now see a whole new meaning in blogs- as we read into the lives of others, we see a part of us in the mirrors of their lives.